A Woman's Voice

 

Today I had the pleasure of eating lunch with three strong, wise, driven, independent, and beauty women. Each one of these women are special in their own way and each one is talented and unique. Together we make quite a team and can accomplish much. From time to time we meet for lunch to discuss non-work things and to empower each other to keep going. I wish I could bottle the energy from the group and sell it, because I think we could get rich!

I’m a young woman and I enjoy being around mature women who have experienced life so to speak. Titus 2:3-5 tells us that it’s older women who can teach younger women the practical skills to get through life. These women got me to thinking about myself and my future today when we had lunch. If I ever get the opportunity to have children in the future I want my future daughter(s) to have a few character qualities and opportunties that I believe that mold strong women. 

• I want them to know and practice the fruits of the spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).
• I want my future daughters to have a voice.
• I want them to grow up to be strong, free thinking and independent women that are not get taken advantage of.
• I want them to have opportunities outside of life within the “normal” realm of their community of where they might be raised.
• I want them to have rules, discipline and consequences within their life.  
• I want them to have an advanced education and value lifelong learning.
• I want them to use their God given talents to serve God and others to the best of their abilities.
• Leave a comment if you can think of others! I might need to add a few more to my wish list for those future daughters.  

Doesn’t every woman want that for her daughter(s)? This is how my family raised me to be. Sometimes I get “the look” or “the comment” that I cannot believe you do that or I would never. I was raised to have a “voice” or “vote” per say when it came to matters. I was raised to think outside the box. I was told that my voice matters because I was good, special and important. I was raised to have an inquisitive mind, to ask questions and “why” if something did not make sense. I learned the value of a work, earning money to have things, and then how to give back to others through service.

I believe my parents did things with intention when they were parenting me and my sister. But I’ve never asked…who knows they might have been parenting us by the skin of the teeth and whatever patience they had at the moment! I believe they both had great examples of strong women within their lives that they modeled their parenting practices after. Whatever they did I believe it worked because I believe that I was molded and shaped into the woman I am today because of their parenting foresight and the experiences they shared with my sister and me. So Mama & Daddy thank you for giving me a voice and molding me into the woman I am today!    

 

Breakfast 101

Well this morning my electricity was off when I woke up so I let a local restaurant prepare my coffee and breakfast this morning. I have not ate breakfast out in quite some time so I was a little shocked whenever I had to fork over $4.89 for a semi healthy breakfast at McDonald's and it did not even taste all that great! I have chosen not to eat breakfast out for two reasons.

My health. I realized I was eating out way to much last year and when I decided to get on my new "get Lara healthier campaign" I cut breakfast out of my plan. (Keep in mind I still eat out my fair share at other meal times!) I want to be healthier and also “practice what I preach to others” so to speak.

I feel that part of being a family and consumer science county agent’s duty is to encourage others to make healthy lifestyle choices for themselves and their families. I want to be a living breathing example to the people I serve in Monroe County. I feel that others will value my advice and information if they know I have tried it myself and have been in their shoes before.

Trust me making this new lifestyle change was not easy! These restaurants make it look so convenient, easy, and tasty with their big flashy advertisements. Pulling through a drive thru is so much easier than having to get up earlier and prepare a quick bite to eat at home…or so I thought before. It does not take long to brew my own coffee at home and grab my yogurt and fruit out of the fridge or prepare a quick bowl of cereal & milk or oatmeal. In the same amount of time in the line at drive thru window I can have my breakfast prepared at home and enjoy it while I’m watching the news!  

Cost. $4.89 here and $4.89 there adds up over time. I save around $150.00 each month on my "eating out" spending plan by eating my breakfast at home. What I prepare myself at home cost pennies compared to the $4.89 breakfast I had this morning! Plus what I prepare at home fits into my new healthy eating routine.

I can count on my had the number of times that I have had a biscuit within the last fifteen months and the majority of time those biscuits were homemade because I could not resist my mother’s home cooking around the holidays or a special occasion! It has been a while since I ate out of the morning so I was a little in sticker shock whenever I had to fork almost $5.00 for breakfast. Oh well...life...right??? Everything cost money and everyone wants to try to make a buck or two when they can.  

So let’s compare my usual breakfast versus the breakfast I had this morning.

 

$1.00 to $1.50 depending on the "season" for my fruit & what exactly I have to eat.

$4.89 on 3/12/2013 in Tompkinsville, KY. Even if I had of ate a yogurt parfait and coffee from the same restaurant I still would have had to pay over $2.50 for my breakfast. I guess I  splurged a little this morning in more than one way!

 

This is something for you to think about tomorrow morning whenever you are hungry and thinking about food. Which option will you choose...the drive thru or an "at-home special"?   

The Game of Life

Since I am in a healing process of sorts and trying to stay positive about life and not do something irrational and negative that I would regret later I have decided to open up more and reflect some on my blog. I am human and have thoughts that need to be expressed, so friends do not call me crazy...call me a work in progress...trying to heal. Blogging is the easy part, facing the new reality and not doing something irrational and negative is proving to be hard.

But on a serious note, as humans, we have grown accustomed to having everything readily available at a moment’s notice. We have been raised by our parents and today’s society to have instant access to almost anything and everything we possibly could ever want with almost no questions asked. Within our instant society also comes the idea that we can have the “best of both worlds”. But really can we have it all…?

• Enjoy cake and ice cream every day without feeling guilty and having the possibility of gaining a few extra pounds
• Have a great body without having to work out and put forth effort to maintain it
• Have a great life and not have to face the reality of situations that might hinder us from achieving what we want
• Call or text to stay connected & show you care…all just because you want someone to feel better after you break the connection…maybe after a period of time & healing…
• Get up early & get work done and to stay up late & have fun with your friends 365 days of the year
• Have a cool fast car with all the luxuries and great fuel efficiency within ones spending plan
• Have a high salary and time off from work whenever we want it
• Enjoy independence & freedom yet have a deep connection with a member of the opposite sex while maintaining the status quo of everything just like it was before 
• You name it…???
• Last but not least…Be a Christian (Sunday-Thursday) and be the cool friend “of the World” (Friday & Saturday)

Seriously, it does not work that way! Usually we cannot have the “best of both worlds” in the game of life even though we would love it! Having the “best of both worlds” is in the ideal Barbie World of fantasyland! We have to be willing to make concessions, compromises, and set priorities within our life with what really matters. The world views my fellow generation (the Millennials also known as Generation Y) as the entitled generation, because we want it all…the perfect balance of work life and personal life, the ability to make our own rules and multi-task our way through everything and anything.  You are in my generation if you were born between 1977 and early 2000s, so let us own up to a few things and be realistic with ourselves if you are in my generation or can relate to what I am talking about. OK? Satisfaction with life is important and our attitude has a lot to do with it, so let us have some realistic expectations. Here are a few things to remember about life…

1. Consider others on your “team” in order to build relationships and help them feel more confident and supported. Do not build ones self-esteem up and then burst it in a moment’s notice whenever you feel like it…and do not play the “let it down easy game”. Be honest and truthful to your teammates. If you want them to have your back do not hit them in the back along the process.  
2. Understand that technology is not everything, generations before made it without the luxury of the Internet and text messaging. Make that phone call you have been putting off.
3. It is not necessarily greener on the other side! You are the one who is holding yourself back in life when you think you it is “greener on the other side” or that you can have the “best of both worlds” because that is not “reality”. Life happens. Situations come and go. Nothing can be perfect. Life is not perfect. If you wait for that 100% perfect moment or the 1 spark to top off all others you have already felt, then you might just miss something great and wonderful.
4. You cannot always have a Win Win 100% of the time unless both parties of the team are willing to put forth the effort to make it work. Just like with prayers, you will not always get a “yes” because sometimes you can also receive a “no” from God or a “not right now” as an answer.  
5. Figure out what is best for you and go with it, but please take time to look around and take inventory of those things around you that have made an impact within your life. Consider others. Take action on things, or they might slip away from you before you realize it.
6. It takes effort to build and protect healthy relationships, so realize what your priorities are and own up to them.  
7. You have control over yourself only, so focus on what you can change and do not waste too much energy trying to force others to change. People have to want change for it to happen.
8. It is never too late to say “I am sorry”, “I was wrong”, or “please forgive me”.   

These are just a few of my reflections & what I have learned while living and working within my normal everyday life. They can be applied to almost any given situation. Once again I am no expert and do not profess to know it all or have all the answers. I have made my own fair share of mistakes! I have a degree from the school of hard knocks, trials and tribulations, and life.

We are all weak from time to time, but we need to keep in mind that we are not perfect and that we each need the Lord in order to grow as Christians. It is OK to ask for forgiveness and help when you need it. We only have one life to live, so it is our job to live our life to the fullest potential that God gave us and if we fail at the game of life it is because we simply do not want it bad enough.   

Life's Bump and Signs Take 2

Below are reflections on the changes I have made over the course of the week since coming upon bumps and signs within my life.

1. I have chosen not to set around and sulk over my new life status (as bad as it hurts)…I’ve chosen not to eat pints of ice cream and bags of popcorn for dinner even though that probably would be real tasty. This week I have tried to load up on creamy rich yogurt loaded with vitamin D and lots of fresh fruit containing vitamin C. My hope was to cut the depression out, promote good mental and physical health while trying to ward off the allergies, sinus, and cold junk trying to invade my life in recent weeks.
2. I have been trying to surround myself with friends and family even though today I am chilling at home alone. There were even a few girls’ nights out of the house to help me take my mind off of things. Being with my family one evening this week helped me to realize that sometimes you need to laugh because life is short. My doctor has always said laughter is the best medicine!
3. I have tried to be positive and patient. Other people out there have it a lot worse than me and I know my problems, pain, and hurt are not life threatening. Life will continue on with or without me, so my thinking has been that I better “get on the bus” or I might miss out on something important. Patience is a virtue that I necessarily was not blessed with, but I have been praying to have patience and a positive attitude & life outlook on all this. Time heals and time helps questions be answered…so I am trying to be patient. I have thought about the book of Esther in the bible this week too. Within the book of Esther God is never mentioned, but His providence is shown throughout the book. God works in His own time and season hence why I am trying to be patient! I am trying to live a life pleasing to God, by obeying His word, so that He will find favor in me. I know eventually I will understand why and how my life all connects together with all the recent changes.  
4. I have been doing a little spring cleaning around the house. This actually has come in two forms. First, I have actually been trying to do a few things around the house that I have let go since it has been winter. Second, I have been reviewing several of the past lessons from my ladies bible class. We are studying the book “Spiritual Spring Cleaning” and several of the past lessons are helping me renew myself spiritually and have trust. Create in me a pure heart, O God; and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Psalm 51:10.
5. I have tried to get back on my physical activity route. I made it to the gym a couple of times this week and I have tried to walk some at home using this workout video I have. I’ve also learned physical activity can also come in other forms. LOL. Yesterday, I got outside and soaked up a little vitamin D and washed my car. It needed a bath desperately so this weekend it got bathed inside and out.

These are just some of the things that I have done this past week since the bumps and signs showed up along my road. Maybe somehow they can help you if you are dealing with something difficult within your life that you might be struggling with. I am not perfect and I do not profess to have the answers to all of life's bumps and signs that come along the road of life, but I can share with you how I have dealt with my bumps and signs personally within my personal life. Keep in mind you have to do what is right for yourself and only you know what that might be. I have no magic answers!  

Life's Bumps and Signs

Trying to smile and put on a happy face. I keep telling myself, "You is kind, you is smart, you is important" like Aiblieen says in the book "The Help". In the meantime here are my reflections on life's "bumps" and "signs". Every individual whether single, dating, married, or divorced is traveling down the path of life. Each one of us is traveling via our favorite mode of transportation (car, truck, by foot, train, airplane, etc.) and we are all traveling at our own speed whether slow, within the speed limit, or very fast. We each see and interpret “signs” and “bumps” differently that come into our view while we are traveling down the road of life.
 
Sometimes we encounter the “sign” of a roadblock and or obstacles that might dart into our path. These make us agitated, angry, nervous, scared, shaken, happy, joyful, thankful, etc. There are even times when the road of life gets a little bumpy which is another sign of sorts, but hopefully for most people the road is smooth with only a few occasional bumps. I’ve learned that bumps usually make us stronger and more prepared for the path ahead in life.
 
These “bumps” come in the form of change along the road too. I have learned that you cannot change the people around you, but you can change the people that you choose to be around. Sometimes people choose to not be around you and that might be hard to grip at times, but change is inevitable and the sooner we accept it the sooner we can be at peace with ourselves. If we want to grow and change sometimes we might have to take risks. “Growth means change and change involves risks, stepping from the known to the unknown.” “Time change, people change, situations change, relationships change. The only thing constant is change.” For me letting go of the past and accepting change can be hard sometimes. I have learned that people grieve and react differently to life’s situations. We must keep traveling down the road because what is right for me might not be right for you. The sooner we accept change I believe the easier the transition is for us to move on and let go.
 
“Bumps” and “signs” help mold and shape our thoughts, feelings, wants, and desires into the person God wants us to be. God is the creator of all things and He knows every detail about us. He sends things our way to test us to see if we can stay on the road and on the right path of life. Usually once, we have overcome these bumps and are driving once again on smooth surfaces we find time to review our experiences and see how they are interconnected. Reviewing the bumps gives us great insight into ourselves and helps us see into what we have become. Reflecting moments like this are when usually we can get a glimpse of the Providence God has bestowed within our lives. It might take months, years, or even decades to see the Providence, but I have faith that it is there so I just wait so that one day I might see and understand how the recent “signs” and “bumps” have influenced my life.

We must have trust in God and believe in Him and His timing. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding" Proverbs 3:5. Leaving you with this inspirational art message, I found today as come to accept my newfound status in life, “I’m not single. I’m not taken. I’m simply on reserve for the one who deserves my heart.”